oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
