People with herpes should wear stickers.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
