oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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