Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
jump out the window naked night went bad
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
