belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
