You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
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