he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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