is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
