he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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