I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize