so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
