I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
he just fucked me for my cheese..
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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