I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Randomize
