I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
