i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Randomize