Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
