I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
