Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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