he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
