yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Randomize