ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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