I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
