There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize
