And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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