I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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