I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
this hospital has no fireball
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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