It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
