im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
