You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
