Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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