Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
