I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
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