She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize