I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
