Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
