he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
