the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
