Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
