who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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