That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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