when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Randomize
