i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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