I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
