They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
We need to get me chipped asap
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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