allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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