got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
