It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
this just has baby written all over it
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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