the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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