North Korea, Best Korea!
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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