On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
